All girls have the fantasy: they put the pillowcase – or net curtain – over the back of their head. They’re the bride. They walk down the makeshift aisle with a posy of flowers from the garden and they make a ring out of string to wear. The wedding fantasy is big with little girls of all ages.
The problem? You think he’s about to propose and you have no idea if you’re ready to say yes to marriage or not. Not being ready – or being afraid of the commitment of marriage – is surprisingly common. You can fantasize about being a pretend bride as much as you like, but the real thing? That’s scary.
A Muslim marriage is a big step, and you should be allowed a moment of careful pause to think and know what you’re getting yourself into. It’s okay to have doubts about the future, but if you’re in any way doubting the person who is going to ask for your hand, then you need to consider if the problem is them – or you.
So many people go through with saying yes, only to break the heart of their partner later on when they confess that, actually, they’d really like to rethink their answer. Instead of breaking hearts and making someone wonder where they went wrong, here are some signs to know that you are ready for marriage.
- You love who you are. It’s a cliche, of course, that you should love yourself first. However, it’s the one that means you can be wholly comfortable with your decision to get married, knowing that above all else, you love you!
- If you can relate to those silly love songs on the radio, and you think of him when you hear them, then wedding bells may well be in your grasp – and you may even welcome them.
- If you’re no longer scoping out for babes beyond the one you’re seeing, then there’s a chance you’ve found “It”. “The One”. “The Soulmate”. A surefire way to know that you aren’t quite happy with the man you’re with is noticing that you’re still looking out for something better.
- Talk to your friends and family. Of course, you should never let the opinions of others interfere with your choice, but it’s nice to know whether they have seen any red flags where he is concerned. You can really shake down their opinion simply by asking them – they’ll be more than happy to gush about him or talk trash.
- You don’t want to run when things get hard. Your relationship is always going to have those little bickers, but if you’re strapping in your moon boots and keeping your feet on the ground, then you know you have something worth fighting for.
- The idea of him being with someone else leaves you bereft, horrified and in tears. Not because he could leave you, but because facing the trials and tribulations of life without him is inconceivable to you.
Say yes, and make sure it’s right before you do!